Connecting with Others
Participate in community events. Check the local community boards for postings about events like a block party or a community garage sale. Volunteer at community events and donate goods or money to local events. This can help you feel more connected to your neighbors.
Connect with your neighbors. Reach out to people who live around you. Knock on their door and bring over baked goods. Say “hello” to them on the street. Be friendly and sociable with your neighbors so you can build a sense of community in the neighborhood. You can also invite your neighbors over for dinner or a drink to connect with them. Offer to help your neighbors. If, for example, you have an elderly neighbor, offer to help them with yard work or a chore like cleaning out the gutters.
Hang out with friends on a regular basis. Spend time with good friends so you can stay connected with them and not lose touch. Schedule regular hang outs once a week or once a month with different friends. Make an effort to keep your friendships alive and active. For example, you may schedule a coffee date once a week with a friend. You may also have monthly game nights with a group of friends. Create traditions with your friends. Try things like getting together on the anniversaries of special events or taking an annual trip together.
Spend quality time with family. Try to make the time you spend with your family meaningful and memorable. Have regular family dinners or invite your family over. Plan a trip with your family, especially if it’s been awhile since you have all traveled together. Even if you aren’t super close to your family, you can still try to connect to them once in a while. You may find that the more time you spend with your family, the more harmonious around each other you will become. Embrace your family's traditions, and try to create new ones. Sharing life event and remembering shared moments helps create a sense of belonging.
Be vulnerable and honest with friends and family. Open yourself up to your friends and family when you need them. Don’t hide your feelings or shy away from sharing your emotions with them. Instead, be vulnerable so you can feel more authentic and real around those close to you. For example, if you’re having a rough day, you may tell your friends, “Today was a bad day. I need some cheering up” or “I’m not feeling great today, I need some support.”
Be generous and caring to your partner or spouse. Treat your romantic partner with respect and gratitude. Give them daily attention and acknowledgement. Let them know they are important to you and that you value them. You can do this by telling your partner regularly, “Thank you for all that you do” or “I appreciate you.”
Overcoming Differences and Disagreements
Avoid yelling or shouting at others. Try not to become aggressive or angry at others, as this will only make the disagreement worse. Take a deep breath and try to respond to others in a rational, calm way. If you are very upset, you can try stepping away from the situation and returning when you are calm and more relaxed. Acknowledge the other person's anger and offer to talk about the situation a little later. Allow both of you to cool off a little so that you can have a more productive discussion that isn't dominated by emotion.
Counter anger with compassion and empathy. Try to respond to any disharmony in your life with compassion and patience. Rather than get upset, think about how you can rise above the situation and find a solution. Try to empathize with others and work with their shortcomings or issues, instead of trying to change them or make them see your point of view. For example, if you get in an argument with a friend, think about how they might feel in the situation. Try to empathize with their point of view and respond to them with compassion, rather than anger. Remember that different events have different meanings to different people. Try to understand where they are coming from by saying, "Help me understand how you see this situation."
Be an active listener. Maintain eye contact with the person when they are speaking, even if you do not agree with what they are saying. Keep your arms relaxed at your sides and turn your body towards them so they know you are paying attention. Nod and say "uh huh" or "okay" to let them know you are listening. Avoid interrupting them when they are talking. Instead, wait for them to finish speaking. Then try repeating what they said back to them so they know you heard them correctly. For example, you may say, "What I think you said is..." or "What I am hearing you say is...".
Be open to compromise. Sometimes, things just don't go your way. You may need to find common ground with someone you do not agree with or let go of your pride and accept a compromise. Agreeing to a compromise may help you move on from the situation and not let the disagreement throw you off balance or into disharmony. For example, you may find a compromise with your partner where you split the household responsibilities, rather than argue about them. Or you may reach a compromise with a coworker where you work together on a project, rather than fight over the project or compete against each other. Compromise means that both parties give up a little bit to facilitate getting part of what each party wants. Be prepared to give up a little so that you can both be happy.
Accept that you may not agree with everyone. A big part of living in harmony with others is recognizing that you may not be able to be friends with everyone you meet. You may have opposing ideas or values and it may be difficult to find common ground. Be willing to accept that you may have to agree to disagree with certain people in your life. Just because you do not agree with someone or see eye to eye does not mean you cannot still have compassion and empathy for them. You can still connect with people you do not agree with and find a sense of harmony with them.
Giving Back to Others
Help a neighbor, friend or family member in need. Show those around you that you care by offering them assistance when they need it. Help them without expectation of repayment so you can feel connected to them in a generous way. For example, you may go see a family member who is feeling ill or unwell. Bring food for them if they are too sick to cook. You can help your neighbor by trying things like shoveling snow for them or taking care of their pet while they are away on vacation. You can also spend time with a friend dealing with a recent break up. Cheer them up by inviting them out or by taking them on a special friend date.
Volunteer at a local organization. Look online for local organizations and charities in your area that need volunteers. Pick up a volunteer shift at your local homeless shelter or women’s shelter. Donate your time to a charity drive or at a local arts festival. Volunteering your time can help you feel connected to others in a positive way. Volunteering is also a great way to meet like minded people and make new friends or acquaintances. This can broaden your social network and make you feel less alone in the world.
Donate money to a worthy cause. You can also put your money towards a cause you believe in. Give a donation to a local advocacy group in your area or to a national campaign that speaks to your goals and values. You may try donating money to a worthy cause once a year or once a month, based on your income.
Become a mentor. Look for mentoring programs in your area at local community or arts centers. Check your local schools for mentoring programs where you work with young people. Try mentoring in a program like Big Brother, Big Sister, where you are paired with a young person and act as their mentor. You can also mentor others by being a volunteer tutor at an after school program. Some alumni associations at colleges and universities have mentorship programs for students to connect with professionals in their field of interest.
Shop at local businesses. Give back to your local economy by frequenting local businesses in your area. Seek out local businesses and support them by spending your money there. Get to know local vendors so you can feel in sync with your community. For example, you may shop at your local farmer’s market and get to know the vendors who sell their goods there.
Maintaining Your Own Sense of Harmony
Find a hobby or activity you enjoy. Put aside time to focus on a hobby that makes you happy, such as painting, writing, reading, or drawing. You may also do a sport as a hobby, such as basketball, golf, or skiing. Maybe you like watching bad television as a calming, relaxing activity. Doing things you like to do can make you feel more at peace. You will then give off a positive vibe that others around you will pick up on.
Try yoga and deep breathing. Get in sync with your body and your breathing by taking a yoga class at your local yoga studio or gym. You can also do deep breathing exercises to help you stay calm and relaxed. Deep breathing and yoga are also great for centering your mind and feeling more at peace with yourself and your surroundings.
Take time for self-care. Self-care means paying attention to your needs and setting aside time to address them. You can practice self-care by taking a long bath at home or by trying on makeup. You can also set aside time to read or nap. Doing exercise like going for a run or doing stretches can also be self-care. If you have a busy, chaotic schedule, try setting aside 30 minutes to one hour a day where you focus on self-care. Schedule it in so you cannot skip it or forget about it.
Use positive affirmations. Positive affirmations can help you approach your life and those around you with harmony and generosity. Say positive affirmations in the morning before heading out for the day or at night before bed. For example, you may say, “I am at peace with the world” or “I feel harmonious and happy today.” Try to live according to your values. When your lifestyle aligns with your personal values and beliefs, you feel more at ease overall.
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