- “Main character energy” refers to someone who lives as though they’re the main character of a film or a novel, usually in a way that is apparent to others.
- The term encapsulates a lifestyle that focuses on romanticizing your life and finding joy and contentment in the little things.
- Foster main character energy by going on solo adventures, treating yourself to little pleasures, and sharing your own joy with the people around you.
What is Main Character Energy?
MCE describes someone who seems like a fictional protagonist. They’re straight out of a book or a film: turning heads on the street, self-assured, a little quirky but not self-conscious. You look at them and get the feeling that they know who they are and where their life is headed. More recently, the term has been used to describe a sort of ethos or way of living that emphasizes romanticizing smaller aspects of life, like riding the bus while listening to music or grocery shopping. For example, you might say, “That woman taking her pet iguana for a walk is giving huge main character energy.” Or, tag your social media posts with “#MainCharacterEnergy” when you’re doing something that feels straight out of a movie, like wandering a new city or flaunting a fresh outfit. You can get inspiration by observing people in a park, cafe, or a public place. If you do not feel comfortable watching people in public places, watch TV and see how characters are depicted on the screen. Take the time to understand people's mannerisms and notice how they interact.
The idea of main character energy began on TikTok. Back in the height of pandemic lockdown, TikTok users began posting videos of themselves showing “main character energy” as a way to find pleasure in their daily lives amid all the isolation. Users started dubbing their vids with an audio clip that began, “You have to start thinking of yourself as the main character,” with snippets that portrayed themselves doing mundane tasks with filters or music that made their everyday lives appear just a bit more special or appealing. Though the term may be a recent development, the phenomenon is nothing new. In psychology circles, this timeless phenomenon is also known as “self-mythologization.”
Main character energy is different from narcissism. Generally, narcissists are people who are self-important, put themselves over others, and pursue attention, and spotting them is fairly easy. People with main character energy, on the other hand, simply find joy in their own routines and the day-to-day of their own lives. That joy just happens to overflow and become noticeable to other people. That said, main character energy can become main character syndrome, which is when someone is so obsessed with being the main character that it becomes performative and loops back around to narcissism.
“Side character energy” describes someone who minds their business. In comparison to main character energy, someone who calls themself a side-character is totally content playing second-fiddle to the more audacious personalities. They’re the funny best friend or wise older sibling. They sip their tea and enjoy life just outside of the spotlight. For example you might say, “I’m such a side character right now,” when you’re encouraging your friends or just basking in their undeniable main character energy.
Signs Someone Has Main Character Energy
They’re comfortable doing activities alone. Someone with MCE is totally down for a solo adventure. It’s prime time for some introspection and self-connection. It’s not that they’re always shirking their friends, just that if everyone else flakes, the main character shrugs it off and heads out anyway. Doing things alone is also a sign of self-confidence, which is that secret ingredient that makes you turn and stare at someone just doing their thing as they go about their day.
They have a lot of hobbies. A main character explores their interests and passions, and also shares them with others. Someone with MCE throws themselves into their interests and spends much of their time learning, practicing, and just enjoying the little activities that color their lives. After all, life is short, and the main character’s gotta take advantage of it!
They’re proud to be a little different. Main characters tend to raise a few eyebrows, but they don’t really care what other people think. It’s not that main characters intentionally embarrass themselves, just that they step outside the routine now and then—dancing down the sidewalk, visiting the playground swings, sharing an appetizer with the next table. Arbitrary social taboos won’t stop them from having a good time. Of course, authenticity is key. Someone doing all that just for a photoshoot or a social media post has gone full MC syndrome.
They’re content with the little joys in life. Someone with MCE takes care to appreciate the little things. Their favorite song coming on the radio, a great piece of graffiti or a mural, a scrumptious pastry—whatever it is, they take a few moments to revel in it. Even better, they bring it to your attention so you can appreciate it, too.
Cultivating Your Own Main Character Energy
Take yourself on a date. Go to the museum or theater alone. Treat yourself to a nice sit-down meal at a restaurant. Buy yourself flowers! The truth is that you’re your own best audience, so try to be the best main character for that audience. Learning to enjoy yourself on your own is also a great shortcut to improving your self-esteem and boosting your confidence, traits that every main character strives for. Also, go ahead and buy that indulgent purchase—that extra latte, dessert, new shoes. Life is short, and part of fostering main character energy is indulging yourself. Within reason, of course.
Update your wardrobe to fit your vision of yourself. Every good main character has this little thing we call “character design”—the way they look and dress that’s immediately recognizable. Think of Elle Woods' all-pink wardrobe. Now’s your opportunity to toss out those old clothes that aren’t totally “you” anymore and bring in some new items that better fit how you want to present yourself. Make a mood board that encapsulates your desired aesthetic, whether the new you is a goth scene kid or a flannel-and-Converse indie darling. Hit up a thrift store to find bespoke clothing on a budget. Fast fashion doesn’t exactly scream “Main character!”
Appreciate the little, good things in your life. Main character energy is all about finding the small bits and moments to romanticize and making them larger than life. It’s not all life-changing adventures every day, but every day can be life changing. Tell your family and friends you love them, visit your favorite spot in your neighborhood, or just take a moment to watch the birds. Keep a gratitude journal and aim to write 10 good things you noticed and appreciated about each day. They can be big or small, from acing a test to finding that favorite pen you lost.
Find the positives in a negative situation. Main characters are on a journey of self-improvement and discovery. Part of that is learning how to spin something negative into an opportunity for growth. Stay positive and ask yourself how to use this to build your character. There’s no plot if there aren’t any obstacles to overcome, after all. Often, you just need a little time and experience before you can reframe your negative experiences. Think back on past hardships and how they led you to who you are today.
Advocate for yourself and set boundaries. Part of being a main character is not letting other people decide your life for you and learning to say no. Tell other people in your life clearly what you’re comfortable doing, or what you’d rather not do. Make your own needs a priority. Make your own responsibilities clear—chores at home, tasks at work—and set a limit on how much extra work you’re willing to perform. Take time to yourself when you need it. Don’t be afraid to bail on an event if your energy is low. Say, “Sorry, but I’m feeling a little low on batteries. Can we reschedule?”
Own and learn from your mistakes. The most interesting main characters are flawed and don’t always make the right decisions. Main characters are works in progress, and what’s important is working on that progress. Accept your mistakes, then ask yourself why you made them and how to avoid them in the future. Owning your mistakes only counts if you acknowledge how you’ve hurt other people. Apologize when you misstep, and let the other person know how you plan to be better.
Remember that you’re also a supporting character to other people. You’re only the main character of your own life, and everyone is their own main character. That’s a good thing! What a privilege to participate in other people’s stories. Be a good side character by making time for your friends, supporting their interests and aspirations, and letting other people have the spotlight now and then.
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