CHENNAI: Women may not really have too much time to be verbal about the many ways in which bearing a child changes their lives after they give birth. But with Chennai's mothers-to-be admitting that they have serious concerns about losing out on personal time and space post-delivery, it is understandable that they seek professional help. According to noted counsellor and psychotherapist Dr Kalyani Sundararajan, a majority of the couples who come in for help not related to marital crises, have to do with pre-natal apprehensions. "Close to 75 per cent of the women I see echo the same concerns over and over again. They are worried if having a child will mean the end of their careers, or their personal space to do things they like," she explains and adds that almost all women express concerns over changes in their physical appearance after having a child. This is shown in the survey which reports 38 per cent of women list the loss of personal time as their 'biggest sacrifice'.She also reveals that these fears are the primary reason for women delaying having a child, especially in the city. "They try to delay having a child so that they can advance the careers they have worked so hard to build. It's understandable that women also worry about missing a pay hike or a promotion if they take maternity leave at the wrong time," adds the counsellor, who has worked with several couples over the years. However, most often, the family of the spouse manages to stress the woman into giving in to having a child. "Adversely, I was shocked to find that in this state women were sometimes unable to conceive because of these psychological problems," she says, stressing that this could possibly be a reason for the spike in infertility seen these days among couples in their early 30s.This of course indicates that it is not just psychologically but also physically that these worries seem to be affecting women contemplating the 'joys of being a parent'. According to Dr A Samida, Head of Department - Gynecology at the Government Kilpauk Medical College and Hospital, after a generation where women would easily bear between six and 10 children, the present generation is physically limited to bearing about two or maybe three children. "Most women are educated and have been brought up with different beliefs. They read and see how women who had plenty of children suffer from obesity, high BP, diabetes and other such illnesses. So, they stick to having a single child and try to keep themselves away from these ailments. Hence having more children has become something of a rarity these days," she explains. This is in line with the study's result that 50 per cent of couples wanted a single child.
Comments
0 comment