How to know you are addicted to social networking

NEW DELHI: "I’ve seen you somewhere,” said boy to pretty girl as they bump into each other in this posh restaurant. “Umm… are you on Facebook?” she asked. They both did the ‘ah-yes-that’s-where’ and promptly agreed to poke each other when they logged in next.

From the days of Internet users being seen as lonely freaks/ losers whiling away their time in cyberspace, the Internet has become as much of a ‘real-time’ entity as it’s a virtual online one.

People are mating and meeting over the Net, discussing fashion and food, supporting causes, promoting cases and doing a hell lot more than correspondence. And most of it comes under the ambit of ‘social networking’.

For many, more than a day without logging on to their various accounts is as bad as not getting their with-coffee-cigarette. And yes, like nicotine, social networking is addictive too and can get serious if you don’t watch it!

Here’s a check list to see if you’re still in the ‘safe-zone’ of social networking or if you have already gone into the can-be-injurious-to-health levels.

NEXT PAGE: Have you bitten any chumps yet?

PAGE_BREAK

You’re entering the danger zone when…

1. You break-up with your significant other and change your status from ‘in a relationship’ to ‘single’… Even before you have told your partner.

2. You are physically exhausted after poking, pinching, trout slapping or throwing a sheep at least 15 people… And you’ve never seen a trout or sheep in real life.

3. You don’t feel popular enough till your ‘social status’ does not change from ‘butterfly’ to ‘mogul’… And then you just have to have an entourage of friends.

4. You start taking personality tests and feel seriously undermined till the time you don’t know what fruit you are, what colour, what film star you resemble most… And start watching F.R.I.E.N.D.S. or Family Man just to see what character you are closest to.

5. You go for a wardrobe change, cosmetic surgery or blow some serious money just because your friends are scoring more on the ‘hot or not’ quiz… And believe you are truly a rock star because you are rated higher than your inner circle of friends on ‘compare people’.

NEXT PAGE: And do you know who’s tracking your profile?

PAGE_BREAK

6. You hate being sent friend requests by anonymous people but still add a profile tracker to see just how many new people click on your profile… And you serially change your profile picture if the hit counts drop on any day.

7. Your friends assume you are in trouble when you don’t change your ‘status message’ for two days… And you feel unloved if an ‘so-and-so is sick’ message does not get at least 20 wall responses from people.

8. You start promoting official work on various social networking sites and call it viral marketing... And your boss needs to poke you to remind you of official work

9. You start feeling socially responsible and think you are an ideal world citizen because you have joined different ‘causes’ from breast cancer to feed-a-child… But you forget that pollution check on your car.

10. You don’t really feel you have attended a party or event till you are not tagged in at least five pictures or videos… You also become cheap enough to start sending ‘growing’ and ‘hatching’ gifts for wedding presents.