If it’s a sweet picture and you like the guy…
“You’re so handsome!” You’ll never go wrong with a simple, honest compliment. Tell him he looks good or make a comment about a specific feature of his you like, like his tattoos or facial hair. As Dating Coach John Keegan explains, "try to be specific [and make it clear that] there's a reason you like them. You want to put that into words." Men love compliments deep down and you’ll definitely make him smile. “I love your tattoos!” “You’re so cute, I can’t even!” “The beard is on point today ????????♂️????”
“Dang! Wish I looked that good.” Tell him he looks great while leaving him room to send you a compliment right back. He’ll feel great knowing you think he’s attractive and won’t hesitate to shower you with adoring praise. Keep it subtle and lighthearted—too much self-deprecation can get awkward or uncomfortable. “I wish I looked as put together as you do today! Lol” “I can’t believe someone as handsome as you is texting me ????” “How do you look so hot this early in the morning? I can’t turn heads until at least 11AM”
“I love that outfit on you.” Compliment his style or taste. Dating coach John Keegan explains that complimenting a guy's style is "a nice thing, it's like saying 'I see you'" without going overboard on appearance-based compliments. This is a great way to be flirty without getting sexual or making comments about his body, if that’s what you’d prefer. He may not be expecting a compliment about his clothes or accessories, so he’ll be pleasantly surprised. “I like that watch a lot. Where’d you get it?” “Only you could pull off that print!” “You look really cute in that shirt ????”
“I love your green eyes.” Point out what you like about his eyes, smile, or how happy he looks. Guys don’t normally get a ton of compliments about things like their smile or eyes, so go for it to make him totally melt. The more specific you are, the more sincere it will feel. If you don't want to comment on appearance, dating coach John Keegan suggests "saying 'you have really soulful eyes,' or 'you have really intelligent eyes.'" “The only thing prettier than that sunset behind you is your eyes ????” “Your smile is infectious!” “You look so happy! It makes me smile too ????”
“Blue is my favorite color ????” Tell him you love the colors in his photo, whether he’s wearing it or it’s featured somewhere in the background. Even though you’re not talking about him directly, he’ll still interpret it as a compliment from you and blush. This is also a good way to keep the conversation going. “I love that shirt. Mint is one of my fav colors!” “I’m jealous you’re at a lavender farm! I love purple.” “You look fantastic in pink ????”
“Looks like someone’s been hitting the gym!” Flatter him with a comment about his physique, even if his photo was meant to be more innocent. He’ll still love the attention and feel confident that you find him attractive. If you’d like to receive more risqué photos in the future, this is a good way to test the waters and see how he responds. “Dang! How often do you go to the gym? ????” “You’re doing something right at the gym because you look great!” “Okay Mr. Fitness! Lookin’ good ????”
“Great photo! Let me show you what I’m doing.” Send him a compliment and use the opportunity to send him a cute selfie or flattering photo of yourself. Stay upbeat to keep him engaged and show you’re interested. If his photo was PG, make sure yours is too. “Hey cutie! Ugh, that looks a lot more interesting than what I’m doing right now…” “Love that photo of you. Here’s a little something for you too ????” “Hi there good lookin’ ???? I see your selfie and raise you 1 bathroom mirror pic in portrait mode!”
“I never get tired of looking at you.” Say something sweet or romantic about his pic to show that your appreciation is emotional, too. If you have a budding relationship, this is a good way to indicate you want to take things further. Say something appropriate for how well you know him—“You complete me!” might be a bit much if you’ve only been talking for a few weeks. “This pic just made my day ????” “I love when you send me a random selfie, lol” “A picture of you always turns my bad mood around.”
If it’s an innocent pic but you’re not into it…
“Nice! Where are you headed?” Send something like this to stay friendly without leading the guy on. This is especially handy for guy friends who might be trying to be more than friends with you. Add a question to keep the conversation casual and pivot away from the photo. “Looks fun! Where was that taken?” “Cool! Is that what you’re wearing to Jen’s party?” “Oooh nice. Fun day?”
“You’ve got good style.” Send a generic compliment or observation to acknowledge the photo and move on. Saying something nice isn’t too suggestive and shows you want to maintain a casual relationship with the guy (even if you’re not romantically or physically interested). “Lookin’ good! ????” “Looks like you’re having fun!” “Nice outfit.”
“I have such a handsome friend!” Use the word “friend” to make it clear that’s all you want him to be. If he’s been hinting that he likes you, this is a chance to tactfully set the record straight. You can still compliment him or say something nice—just make sure it’s not flirtatious or suggestive. “Why are all my friends so good looking!? ????” “Nice outfit, friend!” “Hey friend! Lookin’ good.”
“Any person would be lucky to have you.” Tell a friend he’s a great catch for someone that’s not you. It’s a subtle way to say you’re not interested without bruising his ego or putting him down. Try encouraging him to hit the town and flirt up a storm (AKA, chase anyone other than you). “Uh oh! The ladies better watch out for you.” “You won’t be single for long if you go out looking like that!” “Nice look! You’ll be a lucky someone’s arm candy any day now.”
“Nice?” If a random guy slides into your DMs with a selfie, ask an unenthusiastic question to show you’re caught off guard and not impressed. Keep it short and detached to make him realize you’re not looking to get to know him better. This response is probably too cold for a pic from a friend or acquaintance. “Umm?” “Was that supposed to be for me?” “Ok??”
“Nice pic.” Send this short message to be (somewhat) polite without making it seem like you’re interested. Hopefully he’ll take the hint from your abruptness and stop thinking there’s still a chance things could work out. It’s a little cold, but worth it to set things straight. “Cool.” “Good photo.” “That’s nice.” End your message with a period to hit the right tone. Over text or DMs, periods get interpreted as formal, insincere, or conversation-ending.
If it’s a dirty pic and you like what you see…
“Are you trying to seduce me? ????” Playfully acknowledge that he’s trying to get a rise out of you with his picture. Ask a flirty question about his intentions or just flat out say it worked. Comments like these open the door for more banter (and possibly more photos, too). “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you’re trying to turn me on ????” “Well my interest is certainly piqued ????” “You wouldn’t be trying to get me all hot and bothered now, would you?”
“How am I supposed to focus now?” Boost his ego and tell him his picture has you completely distracted (in the good way)—he’ll love knowing he’s on your mind. This is also an indirect way to tell him you like what you see and you’re open to getting more pics in the future. “Well there’s no way I’m falling asleep any time soon now!” “Thinking about this pic will be a welcome distraction during my meeting ????” “How am I supposed to study when I keep getting interrupted by gorgeous photos like this??”
“You’re so hot.” Be bold and tell him you think he’s hot! He’ll love a compliment on his physique, and he’ll feel more confident chasing you if he knows you’re attracted to him. Comment on something specific—his body, his muscles, or his you-know-what—or stick with “you’re hot.” You can’t go wrong! “Why do you have to be so hot!? ????” “Is it hot in here? Or is it just you?? ????” “Your body is incredible ????????”
“Nice towel ????” If he sends you a shirtless pic to show off, tease him by commenting on anything but his body. It could be his shorts, something in the background, or his hair. This is a great way to keep the banter going and drive him just a little bit crazy as he tries to impress you. “I like your shorts ????” “Lol looks like you need to clean your mirror there, pal” “I can’t stop staring at your…unmade bed!”
“Too bad I’m not there to help you out with that ????” If he sends you a pic of his…you know…feel free to compliment him on it or tell him what you would do with it if he were there. A vague, coy response is great for increasing tension. If you want to let him know you’re DTF, go for something more graphic. “If I was there, we’d be doing more than just talking.” “If only someone was there to give you a hand…????????” “Great, now I have to sit here and fantasize about the things I’d do to you…”
“My turn…” Fight fire with fire and send your own photo if you’re so inclined. There’s a good chance he was hoping you’d send one in return anyway. Only send what you’re comfortable with—just because he sent a full nude doesn’t mean you have to too. A peek at your underwear or a cheeky pic in a towel is plenty! “Check out what I’m wearing ????” “Two can play at that game…” “Hold on, let me show you what a real nude looks like ????”
“I’m not ready for this yet.” If you like the guy but just aren’t ready to exchange nudes or dirty photos yet, it’s OK to say so! Tell him you’re not comfortable yet, or that you were looking forward to an in-person reveal instead. If he’s worth keeping around, he’ll respect your boundaries and adjust his pace. “I like you, but I’d rather take things slow.” “I can’t say I don’t like what I see, but I was hoping to see it in person first.” “I’m not totally comfortable with nudes yet. If it’s ok with you, let’s take a step back for a bit?”
If it’s a dirty pic and you’re not interested…
“Wrong number!” Tell a friend or acquaintance he’s texting his photo to the wrong person to let him know you weren’t expecting this from him. It gives him a chance to say it was a mistake (even if it wasn’t) and hopefully make the situation less awkward. “I think you have the wrong number.” “I’m not sure this was meant for me…” “Double check who you’re sending these to!”
“I like you better with your clothes on.” If you’d prefer to keep your relationship with this guy platonic, just say so. Make a comment that puts him back in the “friend zone” to show you still enjoy his company, but don’t want to take things any further. “TMI!” “Hey, I’m not really into this.” “No hard feelings but I’d prefer to keep things platonic between us.”
“Someone has too much free time…” Send a snarky comment to communicate that you’re not into what he’s sending. It’s a little harsh, but a bruise to his ego will discourage him from sending more dirty pics later. Don’t think too long or hard about coming up with the perfect comeback—shutting down the behavior is more important than being witty. “Really?” “Did you think this would make me swoon?” “I’m sure you must have something better to do right now.”
“No thanks.” Get straight to the point and let any guy know you don’t want any more flirty or dirty pics. It seems blunt, but it leaves no room for confusion. Hopefully, he’ll take the (not so subtle) hint and you won’t get another unwanted pic from him. “No.” “Not interested.” “Appreciate the thought, but…no!”
“Well, that’s the end of this conversation.” Be firm and end the conversation to send a clear message. If he hasn’t taken the hint so far, this will show you’re serious about not wanting these kinds of pictures (or that kind of relationship). Make sure not to follow up. “Bye!” “That’s my cue to leave the chat.” “Ok, we’re done here.”
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