How to Reply to “I’m Bored” from a Child or Teen
"It's OK to be bored." If your child or teen doesn't know how to deal with the unpleasant itchiness of the doldrums, remind them boredom isn't a "bad" state to be in—and that there's no pressure to fill their schedule. As relationship counselor Adam Dorsay, PsyD. observes, "One thing that a parent really needs to be able to teach their child is…how to get the words 'I'm bored' stricken from their vocabulary, and how to brainstorm with your child and model trying on different things to ease boredom." Learning how to pass the time (or simply enduring the anxiety of "doing nothing") may be good for their mental health and sense of agency. If your child has a phone or computer or uses yours sometimes, encourage them not to rely on tech to satisfy boredom, or set a screen timer on their devices; according to phone repair specialist Bryzz Tortello, "You can go to Settings and find 'Screen Time.' Once there, you can select whether you want time limits on apps or content restrictions and even set passwords for those." As parent educator and coach Kathy Slattengren, M.Ed., says, when you give in to a child's desire to overcome boredom or restlessness with tech, "What [you're] teaching them is that any time there's a moment where you don't know what to do, you should go to your digital device. That's not what I want to teach my kids because kids can get addicted to digital devices just like adults." Meet the wikiHow Expert Adam Dorsay, PsyD., is a licensed psychologist based in San Jose, CA. He specializes in assisting high-achieving adults with relationship issues, stress reduction, anxiety, and attaining more happiness in their lives. Kathy Slattengren, M.Ed., is a parent educator and coach and the founder of Priceless Parenting. With over two decades of experience, Kathy specializes in helping parents build strong, loving relationships with their children. Bianca Solorzano, M.Ed., is an infant development specialist and Montessori consultant who specializes in purposeful language, environment setup, activities that aid in development, positive redirection and behavior, and directed choice. Desiree Panlilio is a teen life coach and the owner of Encouraging Teens, LLC. With over three years of experience, she specializes in helping teens and young adults define roles, set goals, develop healthy habits, and create their life paths. Wendy Lynne is a life coach based in Redmond, WA. In 2009, Wendy founded Wendy Lynne Coaching to help individuals break free from fear and limiting beliefs to live a fulfilling and happy life.
"How about you go outside?" Boredom is an experience commonly accompanied by feelings of restlessness, anxiety, frustration, weariness, or even depression. But regular time in nature can combat exactly those things! Encourage your kids to get outside for a little while every day, not just for some exercise, but to get in touch with the great outdoors, alleviate restlessness or cabin fever, and ignite curiosity. Suggest they go for a walk for a change of scenery, or that they meet up with a friend for some social time. Encourage them to use their imagination; they can build fairy houses out of moss, dirt, and pebbles, or play with their toys in the garden or their treehouse. For more ideas, check out our article on "How to Enjoy the Outdoors" with your child and find an activity that appeals to them.
"Why not find something good to read?" Reading is a great way to ignite your kid's imagination, provide cognitive enrichment, and keep boredom at bay. Encourage your kid to pick up a book when they have some free time to spare, or take them to the library or bookstore and choose cool new books to read together. "Rotate the books that are available to the child," advises infant development and Montessori consultant Bianca Solorzano, M.Ed. "Children love new things, so they will get very excited to discover the new books they have available to them." She also notes that weaving reading into your child's everyday life is a good way to turn them into an eager reader. "Make it a part of your child's routine," she says. "Perhaps you begin every day with a book of their choosing, or their nighttime routine has a book included before bed."
"Why not make something?" Necessity may be the mother of invention, but boredom is the father of imagination. Leaning into "boredom" may enhance your kid's curiosity and creativity, two traits that often only blossom in times of boredom. Encourage your kid to channel their boredom into some sort of art project: maybe they can cook a new recipe (with adult supervision, as needed), write a play and act it out with their friends or siblings, write a short story or poem, or paint a picture. Check out these wikiHow guides for other cool creative activities they could try: Arts & crafts: "How to Make Origami" "How to Create Papier Mâché" "20 Easy & Creative Modeling Clay Ideas for Kids & Adults" Performance: "How to Learn to Play an Instrument" "How to Dance" "How to Act" Writing: "150+ Creative Writing Prompts to Inspire You" "How to Write Poetry (for Beginners)" "How to Write a Story" Cooking: "How to Make Puppy Chow" "How to Make Macaroni & Cheese" "How to Make Pizza from Scratch" "How to Make a Smoothie"
"You're bored? I've got some chores for you to do…." Odds are, at some point or other, your kids have come up to you while you're swamped with housework or other responsibilities to complain that they have nothing to do. Why not invite them to participate in daily chores? Not only will it help you out, but it'll foster a sense of agency, accomplishment, and responsibility in your children, as well as gratitude. (Either that, or offering to assign housework will inspire them to suddenly figure out a million other ways to pass their time….) Assign age-appropriate chores, and monitor their work and assist as needed. Even very young children can help with some chores. For instance, if they're one and a half to two years old, they may be able to make their bed, feed the dog or cat, help you transfer the laundry from the washer to the dryer, or wipe down the table after mealtime (with assistance). If they're two to five years old, they may be able to help prep for snack time by peeling bananas and clementines and cutting other soft fruits with a butter knife, helping to set the table, folding washcloths and larger towels, or watering plants.
"Let's do something together!" Hearing "I'm bored" can be a teaching moment sometimes. Your child may feel aimless and not know how to overcome the doldrums without some guidance, but as Dorsay explains, "You can show your child how creative you can be, which is a good role modeling of creativity in the face of potential boredom." Offer to help them find something to do, or model for them how you, yourself, find ways to pass the time. According to Dorsay, you can say, "'You know what? I refuse to be bored and here's how I do it.' Almost being like Sam I Am in Green Eggs and Ham, just constantly coming up with new ideas." To help you come up with fun ideas, Dorsay recommends scrolling through every kid's favorite website for new things to learn and activities to try—wikiHow! "'Can we go on to wikiHow and find out how to make a snow globe at home?'" he suggests. "'Can we go onto wikiHow and find out how to make the best paper airplanes?'" Find an article inspired by your child's interests—or invite them to scroll our categories and select something that grabs their eye.
How to Reply to "I'm Bored" from a Friend
"Let's brainstorm some cool activities." Ask what they're into, and suggest some activities that might help your friend overcome their boredom, whether it's going for a walk, hanging out with you, or reading a new book or graphic novel. Boredom comes for us all now and then—your friend may just need a little inspiration to help them figure out how they want to spend their free time.
"Have you ever done…." Suggest some ways your friend could step out of their comfort zone. Life coach Wendy Lynne insists, "There's really no reason to be bored." If your friend is bored, she notes, "It's [due to] a lack of curiosity and creativity." Trying something new is a good way to foster open-mindedness and innovative thinking. Consider some of these suggestions: "Have you ever gone geocaching?" "Have you ever written and performed your own one-person play?" "Have you ever run a mile?" Reassure them that stepping out of their comfort zone and trying something new may involve making mistakes—but that's OK! It's all part of the process.
"Hi, Bored, I'm [your name]." Your friend might be texting because they want some entertainment. Respond with a fun or interesting text to distract them from their humdrum day. Use these ideas for inspo: "I'm touched you came to me when you had absolutely no other way to occupy your time!" "Boredom is for boring people!" (Just make sure they know you're joking here!) "The cure for boredom is curiosity. There is no cure for curiosity." — Dorothy Parker "Want to hear about my day? Well…."
"Only you control your life—what do you want to do?" Remind your friend they're in control of their own time. If your friend seems unable to get out of their slump, you may need to show them some tough love. "Boredom is just your decision to be bored," teen life coach Desiree Panlilio observes. Push your friend to exert agency in their own life and figure out something to do with their time rather than waiting for you to tell them what to do. "You can decide to be bored and sit there and complain to people that you're bored," Panlilio goes on, "or you can get up and say, 'Hey, I am going to go for a walk. I'm going to go for a run. I'm going to clean my room. I'm going to read a book. I'm going to be with my friends. I want to go to the beach,' whatever it is."
How to Reply to "I'm Bored" from a Guy/Girl
"Oh, yeah? I have some ideas for how to fix that…." If a guy or girl texts you "I'm bored" out of the blue, they may be using it as an excuse to chat you up. If you like them back, send a flirty response their way. Use these ideas for inspo: "What do you want me to do about it? ????" "You could always come over and we can be bored together…." "Good for you, I'm anything BUT boring…. ????" If you're not sure flirting is what they've got in mind, dating expert Kristina Mirgorodskaya recommends, "Try to text the same way [they're] texting. If [they start] showing some interest, such as constant texting, memes, and inviting you for a drink, then it’s a clearer signal to go ahead."
"Let's go have an adventure." If your crush texts you to complain that they're bored, shake things up by suggesting ways to alleviate their boredom—together. Here are some activities you can try to ensure you both have an unforgettable adventure that's anything but boring: Urban exploration Wander in the woods at night Visiting haunted spots in your town (try Googling "haunted spots in [your area]" for tips) Go on a road trip with no destination Have a picnic on the beach Try an escape room Go minigolfing Go to a concert Go axe-throwing
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